After two abortions and a miscarriage, I wasn’t sure a family of my own would ever be in my future. Sometimes finding forgiveness within yourself can be the hardest place to look.

I was 16 and as my parents sat on either side of me, they told me the answer to my questions about why I was recently so sick. I had morning sickness, I was pregnant. I told them they were wrong and that it couldn’t happen to me. I went through the next two days confused as everyone was telling me so many things and how I wasn’t ready for something like this, and it just wouldn’t be good for me. Two days later I had an appointment and my mother took me to have an abortion. I was numb about what I had done to myself and for the next few years I spiraled down and away from God, whom I had always been close to growing up. I went off to college and managed to go through two more serious boyfriends and the loss of my father.  I never got to talk to him about my pregnancy and find out if he was mad, disappointed, or what he thought. It seemed to haunt me on a daily basis – to see the signs and people protesting what I had done, and it was taboo to talk about my life.

I kept looking for someone to love me and help me get through things. When I was in college I met a guy with two kids and thought he was my answer and that he would understand. Suddenly I was swept up by someone who really didn’t care about me as much as I thought, and soon I was lost and alone and pregnant again.  A week later I had a miscarriage. I thought God was telling me that maybe I wasn’t worthy to have another child and it killed me inside. I then ended up pregnant a third time and I thought to myself, ‘I will do it all on my own and I’ll find a way to finish college and make it happen.’ I was told by others that I couldn’t make it, life would be terrible, and the baby’s father would never be there or help me. My family told me it was a bad idea and finally the guy even told me he really didn’t want any part of it either. I was broken and drowning in terrible thoughts for myself and a baby that would be unloved and forgotten by others. I started feeling physical pains again, and it only made me think I couldn’t do this anymore. I made an appointment and again lost my baby.

I asked God for forgiveness and he forgave me 

I now am a graduate with a Bachelor’s degree, a mother of two girls and married to a man that would do anything for us. I prayed for help after going through all these things, and I really had to separate myself from all the evil of the world that influenced me to do things I don’t think I would ever do again. I love my children fully with 100% of my heart and will never let anyone take them away from me. God knows I have five babies and they are all mine. It took me a long time (over 10 years) to even be able to speak about this and deal with who I was and what I had done. I asked God for forgiveness and he forgave me, but that wasn’t enough. I hurt my babies and myself, so just like in any relationship I needed to ask my babies to forgive me as their mother and allow myself to still love them and pray for them. I told God that something was missing, and as I listened to music, prayed and worshiped God, He gave me just what I needed: I needed to forgive myself. I am still working on it, but I am a proud mother of five and have an amazing family that I’m still working on because God has given me the grace to do so.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”



We offer these questions as an opportunity to reflect on your own faith journey and what God has placed on your heart as you consider the courageous decisions you make, the support and encouragement you offer to others, and your daily walk as an example of Christ’s love and mercy.

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”

LUKE 6:37


NOTE: The following resources are offered with the intent to foster additional thought, discussion, and prayer. In some cases, specific organizations are listed as examples of available support; however, this is by no means intended as a comprehensive list, nor is it an indication of formal endorsement by Matthew West’s ministry.

We celebrate all the ministries, churches, and organizations who courageously offer love, compassion, and support to ALL of God’s children.



This organization consults on the formation of post-abortion support services within secular and religious settings including Project Rachel, provides training for care providers, maintains a national “800” referral line for those seeking assistance in reconciling an abortion experience, publishes the International Post-Abortion Support Services Directory, produces and vends audio, video, and printed materials, maintains an annotated book list, tracks support group models, and sponsors the Healing Vision conference at Marquette University.



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MATTHEW WEST’S SONG – The Healing Has Begun

Watch the video, enjoy the song, and reflect over the hope that can be found through the love of Jesus Christ.


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The Story Behind The Healing Has Begun



How you can find hope, help, and healing after abortion by Leslie Graves

If you are in emotional or spiritual pain after abortion, this article will help you learn about different resources and options available to you in your journey to renewed emotional and spiritual well-being.

You are not alone in what you have been feeling, and you don’t need to be alone and isolated as you recover. As you reach out for assistance, you will discover a community of compassionate, experienced men and women who will be able to offer skillful and significant help.
My prayers and encouragement are with you as you walk on this path of recovery. Others, including me, have walked it before you.



“Rise up and help us; redeem us because of your unfailing love.”

PSALM 44:26

Prayer for Forgiveness

Father of mercy and love, at every moment you are present to us in gentle compassion. Help me to know and accept the gift of your forgiveness. Amen.

“Your Father in heaven is not willing that any one of these little ones should be lost.”

(Parable of the lost sheep)


More Stories

When initially sharing UNTOLD, we got tremendous feedback and requests from ministries, centers, and leaders for stories and resources that would allow for thoughtful discussions around the very real and courageous decisions people face.

We hope you’ll take a moment to read these real-life stories, pray over the scripture, reflect on the questions, and explore the resources. Take this opportunity to go beyond the music and into the meaning. May all of us look through a new lens as we support and pray for all those who need love, compassion, and hope, knowing that in all things God works for the good.


Sixteen and pregnant. Two words that, put together, will shake anyone’s world.  Such was the case for Veronica. With every voice you trust telling you that your only option is an abortion, where do find the strength to make a different choice?




It started with a long awaited positive pregnancy test – JOY!  But that joy quickly faded at the very first ultrasound that revealed my baby’s life and my own were in serious danger. How do you choose between your baby’s life and your own, when everyone is telling you that you have to make that choice?




A single mom with no support system and faced with a second pregnancy.  As I walked through the doors of a place that I thought would help me find the solution to my “problem,” I found a much different answer, but one that brought joy to more than just me.